Today's nonsense is keeping it real
It wasn't always meant to be like this. Sure, being the Fleet Street's fourth best footballer relocator rumour ruminator has it perks – like the pulchritudinous women of Stockwell's most exclusive nightclubs projecting themselves with abandon at the pointed toe of the Mill's size-seven spats – but this was not how the Mill originally envisaged its working life. Like 11 percent of kids these days, it wanted popularity, it wanted plenitude, it wanted its name in the most coruscating of neon lights above the community centre in Barnsley on a Saturday night: it wanted to be a rapper.
Inspired by such luminaries as Nas, the Notorious B.I.G. and Tony Mortimer's verse in Let in Rain, the Mill abandoned its youthful hours to performing in front of a suburban looking glass – adorned in a pointing-sidewards Raiders cap and a flabby, off-white vest borrowed from its Pee – hip-hopping until rosy-fingered Dawn peeped over the eastern panorama. Alas to no avail, it seems raps about soil erosion in Hemsworth just ain't what the radio wants, and so the Mill has been left with a life's labour of ceaseless transfer talk so all-consuming that these days it is lucky if it can find half an hour a week in which to get funky. But with the weekend fast approaching, the Mill is determined to get out this rut and back into the groove, just as soon as Friday's flapdoodle is done away with. So let's get it over with then, shall we?
Not content with the midfield mastery of David Silva, Yaya Touré, Samir Nasri and, er, James Milner, the Manchester City top dog Roberto Mancini is looking to strengthen his side's obvious weak spot by lavishing £14m worth of dead presidents on Bologna's dynamic and dazzling midfield diamond Gastón Ramírez. "Ramírez is a good young player, with great potential," fluttered the Italian, eyelashes hopping up and down like an albatross on a pogo stick, but he faces stiff competition from Juventus and Wolfsburg for the young man's John Hancock.
On the other side of city, Sir Alex Ferguson is doing his best to convince Valencia's Jordi Alba that he would be better off in the tea-towel red and black of Manchester United rather than the dinophobia-inducing number Barcelona will be sporting come next August. The full-back will say thanks but no thanks just as soon as he stops laughing. However, in some good news for the Scot, it seems he is no longer going to be stuck sharing the bench with Dimitar Berbatov after Paris Saint-Germain decided that the 31-year-old Count von Count impersonator was just the sort of striker that could lead them to the glory.
Like the Mill missing its funky time, José Mourinho misses Didier Drogba and the Special One is "desperate" to be reunited with his buddy of old. In truth, Mourinho has been a mess without him. He misses him so damn much. He misses being with him. He misses being near him. He misses his laugh. He misses his scent. In fact, when all the contract negotiations are done between the Ivorian striker's Mr 15% and Real Madrid, Mourinho wants the two to get an apartment together. Far from being freaked out by this prospect, Drogba is ready to give an almighty two fingers to Shanghai Shenhua and their £300,000 a week contract in order to move to the Spanish capital. Two players who are not saying no to China, however, are the Blackburn duo of Yakubu Aiyegbeni and Gaël Givet.
Meanwhile, deep in the bowels of the Britannia, Martin O'Neill and David Moyes are holding their glasses to boardroom door as they do their darndest to hear how talks between Robert Huth and cap-wearing's Tony Pulis are progressing. If there is the slightest hitch, both will burst in and offer the wall-shaped human battering ram a shiny new contract. Should Moyes get there before O'Neill, the Northern Irishman will solve all of Sunderland's defensive problems by throwing money in the direction of Carlos Cuéllar. Yeah, The Mill had a laugh at that one too.
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انسخ الكود التالى و ضعه فى موقعك او مدونتك.
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